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[2025/08/02, 6:45:35] James: Pretty up and down over the course of the night

[2025/08/02, 6:45:48] James: Multiple awakenings but also able to sleep again

[2025/08/02, 6:46:03] James: Maybe I just cranked the highs high and then the lows low

[2025/08/02, 6:46:24] James: It feels deeper than that though because of the various breakdowns; the dejavu and the electricity

[2025/08/02, 6:46:34] James: Anyway it is what it is

[2025/08/02, 6:46:58] James: We are each dealt a different hand in life

[2025/08/02, 6:47:23] James: Mine isn’t bad

[2025/08/02, 6:47:26] James: It’s just volatile

[2025/08/02, 6:48:28] James: .

[2025/08/02, 9:26:17] James: Really though what has happened?

[2025/08/02, 9:26:25] James: I look at the art I did over the last couple of years

[2025/08/02, 9:26:34] James: Gradually dissecting my life all the way to childhood

[2025/08/02, 9:26:39] James: Such pain and confusion

[2025/08/02, 9:26:42] James: And it seems to be gone

[2025/08/02, 9:26:51] James: I still think the kundalini enlightenment event was legit

[2025/08/02, 9:27:00] James: I think it consolidated all these conflicting rules within me

[2025/08/02, 9:27:08] James: Maybe that’s why my adhd seems to have vanished

[2025/08/02, 9:27:14] James: I’ve just been… optimised?

[2025/08/02, 9:27:34] James: I still don’t quite trust it but the aripiprazole is gone now and I’m in a low phase and I still feel good…

[2025/08/02, 13:46:29] James: .

[2025/08/02, 13:46:31] James: Observations

[2025/08/02, 13:46:53] James: Sending a link to someone with a hope they will read it makes me wonder how it will be interpreted

[2025/08/02, 13:46:57] James: I don’t care any more

[2025/08/02, 13:47:04] James: My opinion is my opinion

[2025/08/02, 13:47:33] James: I’ll not censor myself unnecessarily, but neither have I been rude

[2025/08/02, 14:18:41] James: .

[2025/08/02, 14:18:54] James: I guess what has happened with mercari is what happens with all companies when they get money

[2025/08/02, 14:18:58] James: I’ve seen it time and again

[2025/08/02, 14:19:03] James: They start out with a lofty goal

[2025/08/02, 14:19:07] James: But cash corrupts

[2025/08/02, 14:19:10] James: The financial year

[2025/08/02, 14:19:17] James: Taxes and payroll and balance sheets

[2025/08/02, 14:19:26] James: I’ve run companies before

[2025/08/02, 14:19:35] James: You always feel like you are struggling to keep your head above water

[2025/08/02, 14:19:53] James: Even when you’re earning a fortune, the amount of overheads and planning and accounting and responsibility to staff

[2025/08/02, 14:19:57] James: And my company was tiny

[2025/08/02, 14:20:04] James: No wonder they all become cunts

[2025/08/02, 14:20:21] James: I’ve never helped build a company where one founder didn’t fuck the other out of their ownership

[2025/08/02, 14:20:24] James: NEVER

[2025/08/02, 14:21:01] James: I’ve seen it at least 6 times with startups as they passed the 50+ staff point

[2025/08/02, 14:22:14] James: It’s pretty sickening really

[2025/08/02, 14:22:23] James: But it’s the governments and the financial years that produce it

[2025/08/02, 14:22:40] James: The unknown. The having to pre-pay taxes in japan despite not having revenue secured

[2025/08/02, 14:22:44] James: It all makes them..

[2025/08/02, 14:22:46] James: Scared

[2025/08/02, 14:22:49] James: They’re afraid

[2025/08/02, 14:22:55] James: To lose what they have

[2025/08/02, 14:23:01] James: Before

[2025/08/02, 14:23:04] James: When they had nothing

[2025/08/02, 14:23:07] James: They were good

[2025/08/02, 14:23:08] James: Now

[2025/08/02, 14:23:12] James: That they have something

[2025/08/02, 14:23:20] James: They are just trying to hold onto it

[2025/08/02, 14:23:22] James: They are not good

[2025/08/02, 14:23:30] James: It’s the same with me

[2025/08/02, 14:23:34] James: Reputation?

[2025/08/02, 14:23:43] James: Trying to hold onto it makes you act from a place of fear

[2025/08/02, 14:24:05] James: You are the puppet of the people who decide this reputation

[2025/08/02, 14:24:13] James: I destroyed my reputation and good riddance

[2025/08/02, 14:24:22] James: Thankfully I still have that money I killed myself earning

[2025/08/02, 14:24:30] James: But fuck those capitalist pigs

[2025/08/02, 14:24:37] James: I ain’t turning back into one

[2025/08/02, 14:24:50] James: I’m gonna cut wood and polish knives

[2025/08/02, 14:25:03] James: And make nice things for once, now the shit has been expunged