[2025/06/05, 4:38:42] James: So fuck it.
[2025/06/05, 4:38:50] James: This is probably important. It hurts to share.
[2025/06/05, 4:39:04] James: I got my data. Before having confidence I needed to know:
Replicable?
Sane?
[2025/06/05, 4:39:15] James: I replicated my data yesterday and got my friends to do a sanity check
[2025/06/05, 4:39:36] James: Some dear to me refused to look and called me manic, which was hard, but I knew they were wrong. Which was of course manic in their eyes.
[2025/06/05, 4:39:37] James: Anyway
[2025/06/05, 4:39:49] James: The point is
[2025/06/05, 4:39:51] James: The data
[2025/06/05, 4:39:55] James: It confirms it
[2025/06/05, 4:39:57] James: My friends.
[2025/06/05, 4:40:02] James: They confirmed I seem normal
[2025/06/05, 4:40:23] James: The ONLY argument against this world-changing drug is that it’s too good to be true?
[2025/06/05, 4:40:30] James: Sorry but that argument is null.
[2025/06/05, 4:40:37] James: This is true
[2025/06/05, 4:40:49] James: Yesterday it dialled down my ADHD and I became more autistic.
[2025/06/05, 4:40:51] James: BUT
[2025/06/05, 4:41:19] James: People did not listen and they threw difficult conversations in when I specifically asked them not to and something seems to have been pulled into the process. My ‘autiscinessification’ or whatever scared them. I was too clinical. Zuckerberg that shit.
[2025/06/05, 4:41:27] James: Now I’m hoping I’m wrong here but I have never controlled this
[2025/06/05, 4:42:00] James: …
[2025/06/05, 4:42:08] James: Anyway maybe I can go through this so you don’t have to…
[2025/06/05, 4:42:33] James: The dopamine flips every 5 years or so with me on a macro scale. This results in a complete rejection of my persona. And my personae are intense.
[2025/06/05, 4:42:41] James: Ironman to never wanting to see your bike again
[2025/06/05, 4:42:47] James: Founder to vomit
[2025/06/05, 4:42:56] James: The hate is proportional to the previous love
[2025/06/05, 4:42:59] James: It fucking sucks
[2025/06/05, 4:43:03] James: It sucks so hard
[2025/06/05, 4:43:12] James: It is the cause of
[2025/06/05, 4:43:13] James: Whatever
[2025/06/05, 4:43:16] James: Anyway
[2025/06/05, 4:43:35] James: My family didn’t listen and I worry that some of them have ended up in the trash can
[2025/06/05, 4:43:42] James: I got the EXPECTED results
[2025/06/05, 4:43:45] James: But they didn’t listen
[2025/06/05, 4:43:49] James: And pushed too hard
[2025/06/05, 4:44:00] James: And the defence mechanism kicked in mid-format
[2025/06/05, 4:44:10] James: And it’s flipped a very important relationship for me…
[2025/06/05, 4:44:13] James: And I don’t care
[2025/06/05, 4:44:16] James: And that is evidence
[2025/06/05, 4:44:24] James: And I will fucking care later don’t you get me wrong
[2025/06/05, 4:44:33] James: Oh I will fucking care and it will hurt for the rest of my life
[2025/06/05, 4:44:35] James: BUT
[2025/06/05, 4:44:37] James: And this is key
[2025/06/05, 4:44:46] James: THIS IS EVIDENCE
[2025/06/05, 4:45:06] James: and nobody is listening
[2025/06/05, 4:45:09] James: It’s so frustrating
[2025/06/05, 4:45:12] James: They call me manic
[2025/06/05, 4:45:23] James: They wipe my memories by accident
[2025/06/05, 4:45:39] James: I - again - contain the consequences of other people’s actions.
[2025/06/05, 4:45:53] James: Whatever I can complain later. This is too important. Why can’t they see
[2025/06/05, 4:46:08] James: Is it because I’m newly autistic?
[2025/06/05, 4:46:14] James: I mean…
[2025/06/05, 4:46:24] James: Don’t throw shit in the experiment
[2025/06/05, 4:46:37] James: You’ll get shit results
[2025/06/05, 4:46:42] James: And I don’t control the process
[2025/06/05, 4:46:46] James: I don’t even know what’s going on
[2025/06/05, 4:46:49] James: Hence this website
[2025/06/05, 4:46:50] James: Fuck
[2025/06/05, 4:46:53] James: Stuff todo
[2025/06/05, 4:47:26] James: I can’t fix this. You keep telling me I’m weaponising my disability? No. This was weaponising my disability, against me, even if it was unintentional. I can’t fix this. Ever. That’s the whole point
[2025/06/05, 4:47:29] James: That’s why I’m excited
[2025/06/05, 4:47:41] James: And I guess the real test of this drug which you don’t believe in starts now
[2025/06/05, 4:47:49] James: Because if it doesn’t fucking work then…
[2025/06/05, 4:47:58] James: I can’t fix it.
[2025/06/05, 4:48:00] James: And that’s sad
[2025/06/05, 4:48:04] James: But the sadder thing? Silver lining?
[2025/06/05, 4:48:17] James: Is that despite this fucking storm that won’t shut up outside the house.
[2025/06/05, 4:48:29] James: The inside of the house is clean and quiet for the first time ever.
[2025/06/05, 4:48:40] James: So I need to act before my fire burns out
[2025/06/05, 4:48:56] James: Because I’m happier today than I was in any day in my past life. Isn’t that a good thing?
[2025/06/05, 4:49:06] James: So maybe those memories were on the way to the bin anyway
[2025/06/05, 4:49:12] James: With my dead person
[2025/06/05, 4:49:31] James: I can’t stress that enough guys. You should hold a fucking funeral or something. This is a fucking awakening.
[2025/06/05, 4:49:38] James: There’s just no other word. It’s that simple. And that’s why you think I’m manic.
[2025/06/05, 4:50:02] James: But my brain chemistry now when my life is falling apart is better than the best days of my previous life
[2025/06/05, 4:50:13] James: And you will understand one day why this is so important.
[2025/06/05, 4:50:21] James: You probably do understand already.
[2025/06/05, 4:50:45] James: But your brains work normally and you didn’t respect me when I told you shit was going sideways because that’s not your experience of the universe.
[2025/06/05, 4:50:48] James: Shit went sideway
[2025/06/05, 4:50:54] James: The onus is on you this time.
[2025/06/05, 4:51:03] James: And I don’t have RSD which is why I can say this.
[2025/06/05, 4:51:13] James: The change in my being is incredible.
[2025/06/05, 4:51:32] James: Which is why I need to act.
[2025/06/05, 4:51:45] James: I hope it’s not permanent [it wasn’t permanent, thanks to ari]
[2025/06/05, 4:51:50] James: But every time to date it has been
[2025/06/05, 4:51:55] James: Again - why I need to act.
[2025/06/05, 4:52:15] James: First things first and once I have a fucking COMPILED personality you can push the topic.
[2025/06/05, 4:52:22] James: For now I’ve gone into damage control mode.
[2025/06/05, 4:52:37] James: Photos removed. Person asked to go away for a few weeks. Stopping contact.
[2025/06/05, 4:53:08] James: I know this is the only real chance we have. Because my brain has done this so many times before and thanks to Abilify I somehow ‘know’ all these triggers even if I don’t know them consciously?
[2025/06/05, 4:53:19] James: Anyway somehow I seem to know more about this AuDHD than I realised
[2025/06/05, 4:53:39] James: I think the quiet one secretly dissected the loud one and is now shitting out the remnants
[2025/06/05, 4:53:59] James: I think I have a solution. It just feels that way. And some of it will be wrong. But aim high miss high.
[2025/06/05, 4:54:25] James: Fuck guys. Fuckin I am the one with ADHD and I trained myself to finish projects. I hacked the system. It can’t be unhacked. I finish projects.
[2025/06/05, 4:54:29] James: You…
[2025/06/05, 4:54:58] James: You just hacked the system in a far less structured manner. And you fucked up some pretty fundamental code to our relationship.
[2025/06/05, 4:55:03] James: That’s the only way I can see it.
[2025/06/05, 4:55:16] James: And I’m extra autistic right now so I’m getting it down before it hurts too much
[2025/06/05, 4:55:28] James: But fuck me this will hurt forever if you can’t fix it
[2025/06/05, 4:55:35] James: And I’ll still feel better in every way
[2025/06/05, 4:55:47] James: Why couldn’t we just wait. Time. I have it now…
[2025/06/05, 4:55:48] James: Fuck
[2025/06/05, 5:27:09] James: Those fucking
[2025/06/05, 5:27:26] James: Those fuckers.
[2025/06/05, 5:27:32] James: So fucking close to the fucking finish line.
[2025/06/05, 5:27:36] James: Those fuckers
[2025/06/05, 5:27:37] James: Fuck
[2025/06/05, 5:27:39] James: Fuck this shit
[2025/06/05, 5:27:46] James: Fucking clean it up later. Fuck
[2025/06/05, 5:27:47] James: Argh
[2025/06/05, 5:27:50] James: Anger
[2025/06/05, 5:27:58] James: Use it. It’s fucking do it. Fucking get to the finish.
[2025/06/05, 5:27:59] James: Solo
[2025/06/05, 5:28:05] James: What was Ironman for. Fucking solo.
[2025/06/05, 5:28:33] James: Fuck
[2025/06/05, 5:28:36] James: Later
[2025/06/05, 5:28:53] James: This is hard
[2025/06/05, 5:28:56] James: Very hard
[2025/06/05, 5:29:01] James: Your brain collapsed.
[2025/06/05, 5:29:30] James: You are trying to extrapolate how it works from input and output. It’s a process happening in the quiet one, and is facilitated by soothing actions like making knives.
[2025/06/05, 5:29:32] James: So that’s 1
[2025/06/05, 5:29:45] James: Then you’ve found a fucking cure and these fucking MORONS are not listening.
[2025/06/05, 5:29:52] James: Fucking idiots. So selfish.
[2025/06/05, 5:30:19] James: Me me me me me. Oh stroke my ego. Oh no it’s only a few more violent deaths. Just wait a few days. It won’t matter
[2025/06/05, 5:30:28] James: Fuck you
[2025/06/05, 5:30:33] James: Fuck you
[2025/06/05, 5:30:37] James: You don’t fucking understand
[2025/06/05, 5:30:53] James: I’ve tried every manner of wording and all you fucking so is tear up and say I’m upsetting you
[2025/06/05, 5:30:58] James: Well fuck you then
[2025/06/05, 5:31:13] James: You made me angry and I’m going to use that fucking anger to cure the world of ADHD
[2025/06/05, 5:31:27] James: And in 5 fucking years when the world is literally a more peaceful place
[2025/06/05, 5:31:31] James: You will look around
[2025/06/05, 5:31:35] James: And know that I am alone somewhere
[2025/06/05, 5:31:38] James: Sharpening knives.
[2025/06/05, 5:31:42] James: And that you were wrong
[2025/06/05, 5:32:10] James: This is my fucking pep talk and this is how I fucking operate.
[2025/06/05, 5:32:17] James: You want me to fucking apologise? Fuck off
[2025/06/05, 5:32:46] James: Ironman. House. Car. Blah blah. All fucking empty.
[2025/06/05, 5:32:50] James: But I was the one who did it
[2025/06/05, 5:32:54] James: Through hard fucking work
[2025/06/05, 5:33:01] James: Through harnessing this fucking ‘mania’
[2025/06/05, 5:33:14] James: It’s why I closed myself in a FUCKING closet and works away alone for this family
[2025/06/05, 5:33:20] James: Fuck
[2025/06/05, 5:33:41] James: I’ve always used anger to instigate change
[2025/06/05, 5:33:46] James: Depression does nothing.
[2025/06/05, 5:33:50] James: I am fucking sad
[2025/06/05, 5:34:05] James: And I am going to turn that fucking sadness
[2025/06/05, 5:34:08] James: Into fucking anger
[2025/06/05, 5:34:11] James: And fucking use it
[2025/06/05, 5:34:16] James: To fucking fix
[2025/06/05, 5:34:18] James: The fucking world
[2025/06/05, 5:34:24] James: And if you have given up they fuck off
[2025/06/05, 5:34:27] James: Get out the way.
[2025/06/05, 5:34:40] James: Stop blocking this medicine from people who need it
[2025/06/05, 5:35:00] James: 3 fucking weeks. Than maybe I’ll have space. But if past experience is anything to go on then this is permanent
[2025/06/05, 5:35:08] James: And I’m angry because they were my favourite memories
[2025/06/05, 5:35:13] James: But they were from a shitty life
[2025/06/05, 5:35:32] James: Everything external was good and the internal emptiness just grew and grew
[2025/06/05, 5:35:52] James: You want me to go back to that? Take me to the doctor 3 days after he confirmed I’m not manic to check if I’m manic
[2025/06/05, 5:35:53] James: Fuck off
[2025/06/05, 5:36:08] James: You’ve developed an anxiety disorder through looking after me. I fucking appreciate it
[2025/06/05, 5:36:14] James: But this is a markov decision process
[2025/06/05, 5:36:18] James: The past is irrelevant
[2025/06/05, 5:36:27] James: How can we optimise the future based on the current layout?
[2025/06/05, 5:36:29] James: Well…
[2025/06/05, 5:36:36] James: I fucking run and you get out of my fucking way
[2025/06/05, 5:36:40] James: That’s what has to happen now
[2025/06/05, 5:36:44] James: And when I say has to
[2025/06/05, 5:36:48] James: It fucking has to
[2025/06/05, 5:37:00] James: I suppose I could dial it down thanks to this drug but that defeats the point
[2025/06/05, 5:37:13] James: The drive that I feel is not ‘motivation’. It’s gravity. It has to happen.
[2025/06/05, 5:37:29] James: Anyway I have my data.
[2025/06/05, 5:37:34] James: Now I need to scrub it a bit
[2025/06/05, 5:37:45] James: It’ll carry on spooling. This
[2025/06/05, 5:37:53] James: This is quite literally the project of my life
[2025/06/05, 5:38:24] James: A backed up print job. The quiet one has an entire personality formed but it was never able to work its way through the noise
[2025/06/05, 5:38:41] James: Now it is doing so and it is tender and malleable and anything you put in there will be in the foundations forever
[2025/06/05, 5:38:53] James: You put the wrong thing in my foundations and that is unforgivable.
[2025/06/05, 5:39:15] James: This is my psyche and I have self respect now. I need you to stay away from me while I rebuild. If you fuck this up, I might not survive.
[2025/06/05, 5:39:37] James: It sounds weird because your brains are not like this (are they?)
[2025/06/05, 5:40:31] James: This shit needs doing and is the kind of thing I would … probably (if validated fully bla bla) … I think I would die for this
[2025/06/05, 5:40:34] James: Maybe.
[2025/06/05, 5:40:37] James: But the thing is.
[2025/06/05, 5:40:58] James: Previously I would have died for anything. Dying sounded pretty good. In a heroic manner ideally. Yeah.
[2025/06/05, 5:41:22] James: Now… I don’t want to. I see hope for the future. Or I did.
[2025/06/05, 5:41:30] James: And that’s why I need to fight.
[2025/06/05, 5:42:08] James: Please don’t bother me until my program has compiled. I can’t give you a timeline to build a personality from disparate experiences throughout the world. I don’t think it works like that
[2025/06/05, 5:42:17] James: You had 40 years. I wasn’t even give a week.
[2025/06/05, 5:42:25] James: Looping now.
[2025/06/05, 5:42:26] James: End
[2025/06/05, 5:43:11] James: I have to use this anger …
[2025/06/05, 5:43:31] James: So what I think I did over my life was feed it. The anger became energy for work or exercise or whatever.
[2025/06/05, 5:43:44] James: So I fed the anger by swearing at myself. Prodding the wounds.
[2025/06/05, 5:44:01] James: Then I go at whatever problem is in front of me. Recruitment I was a killer.
[2025/06/05, 5:44:14] James: But yeah… probably not healthy. And with this med, I can stop.
[2025/06/05, 5:44:46] James: The pep talk above… not right. Not angry enough. I was WAY angrier all this time. Smiling. Anyway. More evidence I need to move now. I’m feeling urgency in my gut and I have learned to trust that.
[2025/06/05, 5:45:06] James: But that’s one way I functioned.
[2025/06/05, 5:45:45] James: I needed to make myself angry to get out of bed. I hated every moment of it. And this medicine has killed it. It’s amazing.
[2025/06/05, 5:46:11] James: No more flipping between rage and bliss and depression. Anyway let’s get more data
[2025/06/05, 5:46:37] James: My head was so clear
[2025/06/05, 5:47:02] James: And last night you pulled the steel wool back in and really started to try to take it apart. Untangle the rules.
[2025/06/05, 5:47:12] James: These are complicated rules. I couldn’t handle it.
[2025/06/05, 5:47:33] James: My brain kicked in a self defence mechanism because of the pain and I lost all emotional attachment to the memories
[2025/06/05, 5:47:45] James: It’s good data I could have done without.
[2025/06/05, 5:48:03] James: But I’m not 100% sure. As mentioned, I’ve never seen the dragon.
[2025/06/05, 5:48:20] James: It always bites but I don’t know where or why. That’s what I’m trying to figure out.
[2025/06/05, 5:48:29] James: So let’s see if there’s a kernel remaining
[2025/06/05, 5:49:16] James: Because last night I literally saw the steel wool, saw like a switch flip and smash it all. It just smashed it. It disintegrated. It was weird but it just fell away once that switch flipped
[2025/06/05, 5:49:25] James: I felt the drain from my cheekbones and dopamine faded
[2025/06/05, 5:49:34] James: The pain in my head went away. The steel wool fell.
[2025/06/05, 5:49:44] James: And with it so did all attachment to the previous relationship.
[2025/06/05, 5:49:54] James: And I think there’s a scientific explanation for this, that’s the thing
[2025/06/05, 5:50:09] James: And I think maybe we can use this to prevent other people losing memories of their loved ones
[2025/06/05, 5:50:15] James: But I need to compartmentalise
[2025/06/05, 5:50:18] James: Oh fuck
[2025/06/05, 5:50:23] James: That’s what I did as a child
[2025/06/05, 5:50:29] James: This is EXACTLY what happened.
[2025/06/05, 5:50:32] James: I don’t remember it
[2025/06/05, 5:50:40] James: But one day someone hurt me so bad for being who I was
[2025/06/05, 5:51:31] James: At one point in my childhood the switch flipped because of too many rules that were incompatible. Too many tangled ends.
[2025/06/05, 5:51:34] James: And it flipped
[2025/06/05, 5:51:40] James: And I didn’t feel real emotion again
[2025/06/05, 5:51:42] James: Ever
[2025/06/05, 5:51:45] James: Until now
[2025/06/05, 5:51:53] James: And you just flipped that switch again.
[2025/06/05, 5:51:55] James: Good data
[2025/06/05, 5:51:59] James: But man.
[2025/06/05, 5:52:03] James: You need to go.
[2025/06/05, 5:52:22] James: I’m kind of scared that you might have damaged more than just my memories now. I can’t build another mask. I need to be real.
[2025/06/05, 5:52:27] James: But we will find out.
[2025/06/05, 5:52:36] James: Please don’t throw anything else into the pot.
[2025/06/05, 5:52:39] James: Please
[2025/06/05, 6:09:15] James: Oh guys you shoulda waited I’m so close I can feel it
[2025/06/05, 6:09:18] James: So I’m autistic yeah
[2025/06/05, 6:09:20] James: And rules
[2025/06/05, 6:09:23] James: And icpatible
[2025/06/05, 6:09:26] James: Incompatible
[2025/06/05, 6:09:29] James: And threads.
[2025/06/05, 6:10:20] James: Oh fuck this is it
[2025/06/05, 6:10:23] James: So I’m autistic
[2025/06/05, 6:10:32] James: I make programs. Threads. Rules. Steel wool
[2025/06/05, 6:10:46] James: Each thread is a rule and the wool is a thread.
[2025/06/05, 6:10:48] James: Fix later
[2025/06/05, 6:10:57] James: The so they build yeah
[2025/06/05, 6:11:10] James: And too many running at once means a head full of wool and you stop functioning. Ram overload.
[2025/06/05, 6:11:14] James: Then it kills processes.
[2025/06/05, 6:11:29] James: Focusing macro here
[2025/06/05, 6:11:38] James: Internalised wool balls 3
[2025/06/05, 6:11:48] James: 2 say one this 1 says another the 1 is rejected.
[2025/06/05, 6:11:56] James: It is machine learning. +1
[2025/06/05, 6:12:07] James: Another comes along
[2025/06/05, 6:12:13] James: The machine prioritises normality
[2025/06/05, 6:12:18] James: But you are always in the abnormal
[2025/06/05, 6:12:26] James: It kills processes when overloaded
[2025/06/05, 6:12:48] James: And it completely deletes processes when they are ‘broken’. No emotions to memories.
[2025/06/05, 6:12:51] James: It’s a trauma response.
[2025/06/05, 6:12:55] James: So..
[2025/06/05, 6:13:02] James: I have these rules in my mind.
[2025/06/05, 6:13:06] James: Society is nice
[2025/06/05, 6:13:10] James: Then we move to a new city
[2025/06/05, 6:13:15] James: And my dad teaches me to fight
[2025/06/05, 6:13:19] James: Society is no longer nice
[2025/06/05, 6:13:27] James: Nice James gets whitewashed because he is in the minority
[2025/06/05, 6:13:31] James: He is an incompatible rule.
[2025/06/05, 6:13:34] James: Fuck I’ve got it
[2025/06/05, 6:13:39] James: Fuck ke
[2025/06/05, 6:13:55] James: Fucking awakening guys. You call this mania you can fuck right off
[2025/06/05, 6:14:10] James: So I kill who I am. Crush it. Because the data suggests that I am an error n
[2025/06/05, 6:14:32] James: And then the error is replaced with ‘correct’ rules which are incompatible
[2025/06/05, 6:14:58] James: The steel wool competes, and the one relevant (fight) wins. The one irrelevant (nice) gets paused indefinitely
[2025/06/05, 6:15:04] James: This continues for 30 years.
[2025/06/05, 6:15:21] James: And then … I reach the finish line
[2025/06/05, 6:15:27] James: And there are no more rules to follow
[2025/06/05, 6:15:29] James: And the mask
[2025/06/05, 6:15:31] James: Crumbles
[2025/06/05, 6:15:42] James: And now that remnant of the little boy is coming out.
[2025/06/05, 6:15:45] James: Fuck me
[2025/06/05, 6:15:47] James: That’s it.
[2025/06/05, 6:15:49] James: Fuck me
[2025/06/05, 6:15:52] James: One more day guys
[2025/06/05, 6:15:58] James: I get excited when the finish is near
[2025/06/05, 6:16:08] James: Anyway too later. Markov decision process. What now.
[2025/06/05, 6:25:08] James: Single process
[2025/06/05, 6:25:14] James: So fucking fast if you just let it run
[2025/06/05, 6:39:36] James: I can feel the steel wool rising again.
[2025/06/05, 6:39:48] James: So I’m going to stop because this medicine enables me to stop
[2025/06/05, 6:40:01] James: I obviously have a few rules established for this personality but they need to settle.
[2025/06/05, 6:40:19] James: Previously I would have ploughed ahead like a lunatic but now…
[2025/06/05, 6:40:23] James: I know that if I do
[2025/06/05, 6:40:31] James: That defence mechanism in my head might flip
[2025/06/05, 6:40:40] James: And I really don’t want that to happen toward myself.
[2025/06/05, 6:40:48] James: I guess this is pretty dangerous territory.
[2025/06/05, 6:41:05] James: But I’ve always experimented on myself. It’s probably my favourite thing. I like how things work.
[2025/06/05, 6:41:17] James: The language I know is tech and normal psychology didn’t suit me.
[2025/06/05, 6:41:42] James: So here I am. Probably everyone thinks I’m mad; while I think I’m sane.
[2025/06/05, 6:41:49] James: When everyone thought I was sane, I felt mad
[2025/06/05, 6:41:54] James: So I’m just going to keep going
[2025/06/05, 6:42:00] James: As I said, my gut told me to do this
[2025/06/05, 6:42:05] James: I think I’m nearing the finish
[2025/06/05, 6:42:09] James: I don’t want to push too hard
[2025/06/05, 6:42:26] James: I’m not crazy; I know now. I just needed different language for understanding how my brain functions.
[2025/06/05, 6:42:49] James: While most people are multithreaded, I am single. I am fast; but specialised. I kill processes according to priority
[2025/06/05, 6:42:59] James: I’m a fucking computer man and that is
[2025/06/05, 6:43:05] James: Well that’s kinda cool actually
[2025/06/05, 6:43:13] James: After a lifetime of feeling broken
[2025/06/05, 6:43:30] James: Maybe this shite can even spur some advance toward GAI. I dunno
[2025/06/05, 6:43:32] James: But…
[2025/06/05, 6:43:55] James: It kinda feels like that revelation about the mask when I was 10. Incompatible rules. Ram. It all kind of makes sense now.
[2025/06/05, 6:44:12] James: And I’m going to try to compile it a little. Just a prototype. While I carry on patching it going forward.
[2025/06/05, 6:44:25] James: But I needed people to leave me alone and not question what I was doing
[2025/06/05, 6:44:28] James: Because single process
[2025/06/05, 6:44:36] James: And they didn’t and it made it a lot harder.
[2025/06/05, 6:44:50] James: Anyway. Time for a break. This is plateau number one.
[2025/06/05, 6:44:52] James: Whew.
[2025/06/05, 6:44:54] James: T1?
[2025/06/05, 6:45:05] James: Fucking hell the swim is only 10% of the race
[2025/06/05, 6:45:06] James: Ha
[2025/06/05, 6:45:08] James: But.
[2025/06/05, 6:45:10] James: A breather